Hello, I'm Still Around, Just A Little Down
I know I haven't been around here much or for that matter to any other of my accounts. I just been having so much going on in my life and had to focus on other things for a change. Currently, I have been helping my mother keep up with her medical appointments. She is home bound with a recurrent diabetic ulcer on her foot. I wish I live near her to help take better care of her. But it is difficult. She forgets that I have a family to tend to.
Yes, she needs my help, but I don't appreciate the put down. I'm the only one in the family to make sure things are well with her. I have to now make sure her pill box and insulin are pre-filled. As visually she is unable to see. I have to do some cleaning and organizing because the aid can't do somethings and or my mother doesn't permit them to do their job. Money is always missing. She is gaining more weight and not getting enough exercise.
Good Lord, should she finally lose her foot, I fear that things can only get worse for me and her. And I don't know how else to deal with her. Half the time she drives me crazy. My siblings are no help leaving it all to me. It is not fair. I have a family too and because of her I am partly unable to work a full time job as who will take her to her appointments. So I suffer financially. It is so hard to live this way....and then to pretend to act like it is not that bad. Well, it is. I have my own heath issues as well. I have been trying to resolve. Don't worry. It is not life threatening. I also have other problems a fear will be coming up soon that I have to deal with and wonder if I am strong enough to tackle it on. Oh, did I mention my mentally challenge brother is missing, now over a week and I don't know how to tell her being concern with her health.
I guess because of all this, my heart just isn't into writing as much. So I am writing here to see if it will help me get back into it. It also doesn't help when you don't hear from your friends. And it hurts when people you've been in contact suddenly don't have time for you. I understand very well about being busy....But I just don't buy that a friend can't take a minute just to say hello and I get tire of being the one to always initiate. So I guess they weren't really truly my friends to begin with.
I did write a little on a story I started to work on because I didn't feel people were interested in my DQ fics. We'll see what happens. I do want to return to writing DQ and replace all those stories I lost when I had that computer trouble.
Well, I guess that is enough of my nonsense and let me get back to dealing with them. I hope and pray all of you are well and not going through too much headaches at once. Yes, I am in serious need of some breather or blessings.
PS....Ooops, I forgot to mentioned that my husband and I just made our 20th year aniversay on the 24th. Cool! And I just retun from my trip with him. A most relaxing wonderful time I needed.
posted by Maritza @ 7/25/2007 11:16:00 PM
4 Comments:
I am glad you were able to have a trip with your husband , you needed it. I am interested in you fan fictions and would love to read any you write. Your problems with your mother reminds me of me a few years ago. My mother had daibeties and he body was failing. I lived closest so care fell on me. I had a family and was working full time. The people we hired to help her did help some but we couldn't leave her with any money because it disappeared. We did learn that our city had senior transportation that would take her and her helper to doctors for a smallfee based on ability to pay. That helped since I worked. This was a very hard time for me. But now that I lost her I miss her. I wish you the best and that you descover how to balance all of your hats. I know how hard it is!
Wow, Thanks Lynn for the support. Yeah, the bulk of the care of my mother is on me, ever since the age of 10 and maybe younger. I had to be the one to help advocate and remind her to keep appointments and look up for the directions as well as watch over my sister. I was constantly out of school to assist her. Yet, I made it through school alright. No, it is not easy. I've wanted to move out of NYC but can't because of her unless I bring her as well.
I will hopefully start writing DQ again. It was so upsetting losing all my writing I had on my laptop. I do have some long hand stuff that I can redo again. I did however wrote something short some days ago. I should work on finishing it.
Thank you for responding. I really appreciate that.
Hello Maritza,
I'm shocked to read about your problems. It's a pity, I live some thousands kilometers away from you. I would be able to help little with your mother.
After retiring early (age of 58) I started to look after some old people. So to do something useful and sensible. I got so much in my live, so I feel obliged to give something back to people, who are not so priviliged.
You don't have people in USA who want to help voluntary?
In Germany we have some people, we call them the "young oldies", who want to do something useful and help others in need. They visit sick people in hospitals and nursing homes, visit them in their flats too, to help with housework, shopping, reading newspapers or books to them, or at least listen to their talking.
I makes me feel good about my situation. It gives me a clear conscience, not to think: Why was and is my life so much better than theirs? Why did I have so much luck in my life and they had bad luck or had a very hard life?
Thanks annonymous, is this Maria? We do have aid services here, but the problem is finding honest and reliable people and it's only limited for 3 hours a day for her.
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